Tag: writing

Life is good.

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Y’know that? Life. Is. Good.

I ran into a lady the other day who didn’t share the same feelings as me. She was going through some hard stuff, and because I wasn’t, at the time, she assumed that I didn’t understand what it’s like to go through hard stuff.

Guys, life is hard. And I guess it’s true that some people aren’t hit with hard stuff until later in life. I was hit with hard stuff earlier on, and there’s probably a lot more hard stuff to hit me. But we have to keep on trucking. I can choose to focus on the hard stuff itself, or the hope and belief that God is in control, loves me, and has a greater plan than I can see or understand.

I don’t mean to undermine hard times. Suffering sucks. I never want it, and cry when I’m going through it. Praise God that I have learned how to cry out to GOD in difficult times. Praying all the time. Trusting. Waiting. Worshiping while waiting.

 

Last night I was feeling sick. And even though I wanted to go dancing, I stayed home and went to bed. 10 hours later, I was feeling better. So I worked today. And was feeling progressively better throughout the day. And here it is, almost 8pm, and I feel SOOO much better than last night.

So well, in fact, that I decided to clean my apartment. It’s been a whiles since I did that…. because I honestly haven’t been home. But uhhh it needed it. And now it’s looking a lot better! Lots of organizational shtuff had to be done. Filing of papers. Stacking of books. Organizing my gift box/wrapping stuff.

I still gots to go through my closet a little better and rid of unworn items. I feel like I am constantly doing this since I seem to gravitate towards wearing the same 5 articles of clothing each day. Hahahah 😀

It feels good to have some order in my home life. I don’t like to come home to a freakin’ tornado. I do treat this place like a base though. I pop in, sleep, do laundry, work, grab stuff, and leave. Being here tonight is kindof a rarity.

I like it. Need it.

Tomorrow is going to bee busy. Ish. Busyish. Buzzish

I have prayer & church. A meeting. A birthday party. Was asked to go biking but ehhh I don’t really feel like it.

And rest. Scheduling in some rest. Bible reading. Book reading. Playing music #worshiping <3 🙂

 

Spending time in the presence of the King. Need it.

Sorry this post is all over da place guyz. I’m just throwing all my thoughts here, as you can tell.

MMk time to move on with my life.

Focus on Jesus, not the waves.

Remember God’s faithfulness and that all of his promises are true. He is the Promise-Keeper.

🙂

And He is the Perfect Father. He takes care of His children. So listen for His voice. And listen to what He says. And obey. Trust and obey. For there is TRULY no other way.

kk more later, <3 xxx V

You know I must be sick because

Published on by Velvet2 Comments

I am not going dancing tonight. But more than that, I’m not going dancing tonight with the french model that I met dancing last week.

Yep.

I am not well. Unwell.

And sad.

So so sad.

But God knew that I needed to stay home tonight. Siggggggggggh so here I am! Home again home again dickory dock.

*Shrug*

I’m now gonna make myself as snug as a bug in a rug.

I didn’t yet mention that we were going to go dancing at a spot I haven’t been before. He goes every week though. Dang.

He’s an eclectic dude. I hardly know the guy, of course. But I know that accent is fire. Not fire, actually. That accent melts out of his mouth like chocolate left by a fire. A french chocolate puddle. The aroma is delicious.

Okay I’m done. And single. And tired. And ill.

Hahah I need sleeeeeeeeeep.

To be continued my friends. It’s 9:43pm and I have to start working at 9:00am tomorrow. Sooo I’m going to attempt to get 10.5 hours of sleep now. Shouldn’t be too terribly hard. I think it’s an ibuprofen kind of night. I never take that stuff, so you know I must be sick.

But come on, the dancing alone tells the tale. Let alone the dancing with the french model. Life is unfair sometimes.

But I trust God! And He weaves my story together. He protects me, because He is the Perfect Father. xoxoxo <3

xxx

More later

<3

 

V

Tired

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And still going to write this blog post. I’ve started about 4 in the last few days and never got around to finishing them or posting them so I’ma start from scratch right meow.

I should be napping right now, but I’m going to nap right after dis! Last night was Tuesday which means DANCING! Yes

Last night it occurred to me how special the place I go really is. It’s quite the hole-in-the-wall joint. It’s a latin dance social put on by a DJ/dance instructor that owns a local dance studio. He and several instructors come and dance every week as well as dozens of other extremely talented dancers. There are plenty of regular folk too (like me!) and it’s sooo much fun being able to dance such eclectic people.

Last night I danced with a french model multiple times. I danced with him more than anyone else. Hahaha guys, this dancing thing has brought so much joy and FUN into my life. And has given me some pretty great stories as well. Last night was a much better experience than when I went dancing on Saturday night at a new location. There were only like ten people there, and I ended up dancing with the security guard the whole night hahaha. 😀 Except for when I was getting harrassed by a drunk guy named Carlos who kept on trying to kiss me. Eww. After he LIED about being able to dance bachata. Ha! That dude couldn’t bachata for crap. It become quite obvious the mo we got onto the dance floor. I was like uhhmmm you don’t actually know how to dance do you. And he was like hehe uhhhh

 

Yeah buddy there was no hiding it! ANd then the whole “you are sooo beaUtiful! Your lips, your hair, your eyes. Woooooow. I want to KEESE you!”

NO

But he did buy me a mojito, so that was cool. The mojito ALMOST made up for his shennanigans. 😉 lol

I’ll keep you posted on dancing adventures, and the men I meet along the way. 🙂

Meanwhile, I love blogging. I love the bible studies I’m currently involved in. People keep saying “Praise God that you love children and He is using you to teach them.” Ummm

Yeah I guess I actually do love children…………………………………………………………………. it’s weird to think that, type it, believe it? Acknowledge it? I just haven’t had a lot of experience taking care of/being around kids besides my siblings (I’m one of five). And some nannying/babysitting here and there, but not a lot. Kids are tiresome, loud, needy, exhausting. But So Are Lots of Other Things. It definitely helps to uhhm make sure I’m getting enough SLEEP –soon, soon– and take care of myself well. Besides sleep, getting enough rest in da Lord is vurrrrr important too!

SO I’m going to go take a nap, and then I’m going to work on my book. The one that is on Christian Living/Fundamentals/how to grow spiritually. If I don’t schedule it in to work on/edit the book, it ain’t gonna happen. It hasn’t happened in months actually. Time to pick this baby up again.

And then I shall go to work. With the grocery store along the way for my client. And then I have a night shift tonight at my other job. Before I start that I’ll probably play some guitar. Life is good!

Enjoy your Wednesdays, everyone. And if you’re bored, watch my latest video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XkOMfzZfRk

 

GOD BLESS! <3 xxxx

V

new shoez

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Ahhhhhh there’s something about getting new shoes!!!!! Especially when they’re FREE

Yes, God is SOoooO good to me! I have been needing sneakers for far too long. Specifically small, cute black ones with mesh.

The last few days, my new client has been commenting on my shoes. “I’m worried about you wearing those flip-flops!” She’s kinda right; I’ve been tripping over them a bit. But her house is really hot and I’m moving around all over the place so it’s not my favorite choice to wear sneaker-like shoes.

Tonight one of my flip-flops straight broke. And it wasn’t the kind of breaking where you can just pull the piece back through the bottom of the shoe. The strap snapped!

My lady (we’ll call her B) said, “do you have any sneakers in your car? Or those flats that cut your feet? Not that you’d want to wear those necessarily…” I had told her about some leather ballet flats I bought last year, thinking I was making an investment on shoes that would last for years to come. Unfortunately, they cut my feet every time I wear them. I can’t seem to break them in. sigggggggh

I told her I did have those flats, but I didn’t want to wear them… I almost tried to tape or staple the shoe back together, but I asked B what size shoe she wears. She said 9. I usually wear a 9.5-10 depending on the brand– yes, I know I have big feet. DEAL.

She said she has some shoes around somewhere and told me to check in a closet near to us. There were some brand new black sketchers. She told me to try them on. They fit like a glove. I said “ooh wow these fit great!!! Thanks so much for letting me borrow them!”

And B said “Why don’t you keep them? Think of them as a birthday present!”

My birthday is in 3 weeks <3 <3 <3

GOD IS SO GOOD

legit these are the perfect shoes. Perfect fit, comfortable, breathable, stylish, not bulky… they’re cute and practical and puuuuuuuurfect <3

And I’m not sure B would’ve given them to me if I hadn’t brought her some chocolate and PB-filled pretzels. She asked how much I owed her and I said not to worry, it’s a gift! She said “it’s not even my birthday” to which I said “but it’s your birthday month!” [[I’m all about that celebrating]]

I did not expect anything from B for that gift. It goes to show how giving can be such a huge blessing! It can mean so much to people! And it creates a spirit of giving.

Now I am blessed with the perfect shoes!!!!!!!!!!!! And a stronger friendship with B!

Praise God, from whom ALL blessings flow 🙂

Have a blessed night friends!

xxx

V

almost midnight

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and I’m definitely ready for sleep. I caught a second wind but I know I’ll be able to fall asleep once I lay my head down. Unforch I’m about to start a night shift. Luckily I don’t have to stay awake all night long though; I just have to check on my lady every 3ish hours, unless she’s making uncomfortable teeth-grinding noises. That’s how she communicates: by grinding her teeth. She doesn’t necessarily choose to, she just does. The grinding could mean any number of things. I usually go through the list and check out whatever she could need, and then pray the grinding stops.

Tomorrow is Thursday. The week flies by when one is having fun. I have been having too much fun dancing. Too much. Honestly. Hahah I love it though. Everytime I think about it I get excited. I am going dancing again on Saturday night at 10pm, God willing.

It’s too late to delve into the rest of my thoughts for this week and weekend. All I can say is, time is continuing on. October 3rd becomes October 4th. Night becomes day. Seasons change. But I feel … the same. The progression of my maturing is molasses slow. Impossible to see day to day, but perfectly clear in hindsight.

God has brought me a long way. just like He brought Joshua and the Israelites. Check out this verse from Joshua 11:6

“The LORD said to Joshua, “Do not be afraid of them, because by this time tomorrow I will hand all of them, slain, over to Israel. You are to hamstring their horses and burn their chariots.”

That’s what I choose to focus on. God carries us through every situation. So whatever tough situation is on your plate right now, choose to focus on Christ, and the work that HE is doing. And the situation will seem effortless and light. It will fly by and you will say “wow, is it really overwith already?”

That’s how I choose to view this night shift. By this time tomorrow I will have completed it, worked, rested, prepared, worshiped, worked again…. Loved, laughed… listened to the Lord. Lavished life.

I should call my family. Time is short, friends. This life is but a blink. Let’s not take it for granted!!!!!!!!!!

Love to all…. Christ can accomplish within me more than I could ever ask, think or imagine. Ephesians 3:20

For His glory~

 

xxx <3

V

before & after dancing

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I’m starting to write a post now, at 7:14 because I wanna get hyped for bachata & salsa!!!!!! Not that I really need help, since this is THE highlight of my week…. besides maybe more dancing on Saturday night?!?! And maybe Thursday night?!?!?

 

But uhh yeahhhhh I bought two new dresses today… Not sure which one I should WEAR! Probably the blue one. I might even post a picture if I take a cute one hehe

So I’m about to get ready and then I’ma drive down to go dance. It’s 45 minutes away. Not bad. I’m used to living in the woods where everything is far away so 45 minutes really aint bad!

I almost wasn’t going to go dancing about 2 hours ago because I was feeling rather ill. But I think the main reason I was feeling illish was because I’ve been eating too many carbs lately and not doing enough exercising!!! So dancing is DEFINITELY what I need! Plus, I didn’t go on Saturday night specifically so I would be well enough to go tonight!

Ba-da-BOOM! Now I pray the Lord guides my steps and keeps me from bumbling too much. I’ve been rather butter-fingerish the last couple of days… hahahaha 😀

kk I’ll update later 😉

So here we are. It’s 12:18am… I’m to the place I’m staying a bit earlier tonight. Probably for da best since I gots to get up and go to bible study in the a.m.! Ahhhhh

it was so fun guys. Like, SO fun. I’m just feeling the love of God. He is so good to give me dancing! It’s such a beautiful gift to me. And I’m not going to abuse it like I’ve done with every other exercise. Once a week has been wonderful. Who knows, maybe I’ll go to the one this Thursday. Definitely the one on Saturday night if I’m up for it.

Ooh dang, my hip is definitely talking to me. And my lower back. Lots of spins and twists tonight. Hmm. One guy accidentally hit my hand on the wall. That was pretty funny. He said he would buy me a drink next week. And then he said the guy next to me would buy it. Then he said he’d buy me a soda. I dunno guys, I have a feeling he wasn’t telling the truth 😉

I danced with some patient gentlemen tonight. They were doing the salsa basic with me and said I was pretty good. I really gots to get on the taking-classes-wagon. Perhaps this Sunday? I found a private instructor who teaches on da weekends. We shall see. If I am not too sore/alive after possibly going dancing Saturday night (it goes from 10-2!) then I will see about taking a class Sunday afternoon. Though I should probably call the guy and see if he has any openings and if it’s by appointment only or a walk-in.

Yuppppp fun fun fun it was fun.

Back to the exercise thingy. Words cannot describe my gratitude and awe of my amazing God, the One True King. He had been nudging me to stop working out and trust Him for months and months. I would go a while and then start working out again. I couldn’t see that He would take care of me. So I stopped working out. Started trusting God. And within a few weeks, He gave me an opportunity to dance. After I prayed that He would give me an. opportunity. to. dance. I actually wrote a song called “Father Daughter Dance” which I’ll upload to YouTube eventually (youtube.com/skizarefun09). The song is about the dance of life, and dancing with God by following His lead. <3 <3 <3

But uhhhh yeah dancing is such a wonderful workout, but it’s way more than that. It’s life giving, heart-filling. Satisfy. Rich. Exhilarating. Expressive. Personal. Stylish.

I love dancing with so many different types of folks. I can’t even tell you how many dudes I danced with this evening. And each of them had such different styles! I’m learninggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3

🙂

K I should go to sleep now! I gots to get up at …. 7:30 I guess. It’s now 12:43 cuz I got side-tracked on facebook. #CLASSIC

Yeah I get up at 7:30, leave at 8:00. Go to WaWa to get coffee. Prepare the music time when I arrive at da church. I guess. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay life is good.

God is better.

<3 Buenas noches <3

V

low thrill threshold

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my new client uses the phrase “low thrill threshold” when she gets excited about something seemingly mediocre. I lovee this. with two e’s

because it’s soo joyful! There are too many things to find joy in day to day that we choose to overlook because we focus on what’s wrong or worry about what we have yet to do. I am SO thankful that my new lady is joyful. Especially given her circumstances. She is disabled, doesn’t really leave the house, and her husband of 39 years just passed away in August… hmmm

Writing all that down and then reading it makes me feel pretty good about my life and my situation. When I start to feel down or depressed or hopeless it’s a good reminder to look on the bright side and acknowledge it could always be worse.

Back to the low thrill threshold. The littlest things excite me lately. My friend told me yesterday that I seemed “lighter”, and I want to attribute it to dancing. I am very passionate about it and it brings me SO MUCH JOY. It’s so fun. Like soOoOoOOoo funnnn!!! I’ve been missing it in my life for too long!

I danced ballet when I was like 6-10. Then I did some ballet in 8th grade… it was a summer camp. So I was like 13.

Theeeeen I did break dancing my senior year of high school…. and freshman and sophomore years of college. I loved that and got super strong, which was awesome.

So it’s been quite a while since I have danced. Besides dancing around the house when nobody is around! 😀 😉 <3 🙂

Plus, dancing with another person is a whole nother animal. Following the dude while he leads makes me look like a way better dancer than I feel like I am. I know it takes some #skillz to follow well, buhh likkke I know we be lookin like Dancing with the Stars a little bit and I don’t feel like I can take credit for that 😀

Anyway, dancing has brought sooo much joy to meeeeeeee and it’s seeping into all other parts of my life! Contagiously! Like a smile or a yawn! I guess more like a yawn, because a smile doesn’t always spur grumpy tired people to smile back.

Now I’m not trying to say that dancing qualifies for a low thrill threshold. It’s quite exhilarating, actually. But the overflow of joy that it continues to bring whenever I think about it in between days that I dance is crazy. All I can say is … Why does God give me such good gifts?!

??

?

.

..

…

..

.

?

??

I mean, ay I’m not complaining. Thanks and praises to my King all da way! He is good and deserves to be praised. That’s all I can say!

SO my fine feathered friends, look for the joy. I pray that God blesses each of you with something that brings you overflowing amounts of joy! He is good and worthy of our praise!!!!!

LOVE to all xxx <3

V

God’s timing

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it never seems to line up with our timing. We hope and wish and dream of something to go or be like we want it to, and God withholds it or changes it. And then He presents something seemingly foreign to us and we don’t think we’re ready or don’t know if we even wanted that thing in the first place.

Trusting in God and His timing is a scary concept. It’s a scary thought. It’s trusting in things unseen. But we know that we can trust God, because he is Faithful. Faithful is His name. He is the Promise-keeper and always keeps His word. He is true to His promises. And He promises us in His word that He will take care of us and bring us, a good work, to completion.

That means giving us things that we don’t necessarily want (at first).

That means taking things away that we think we need

That means withholding from us things that we feel ready for, and desire.

God knows best. His thoughts are so much higher than our thoughts. I freely say, I do NOT choose well for myself. It’s pathetic, really. The amount of things that I think are good for me, think that I need, or things I just mindlessly do. Things that I say I will never do again, or things that I say no to one day, and yes to the next.

The law of sin wages war against my soul every day. Every day is a dying to self. Every day is picking up my cross and following Christ. And some days I carry the cross successfully. I carry it far, and without much struggle. Other days I can’t seem to lift the cross of the ground. I manage to drag it a few feet, before it crushes me underneath the weight of itself. Those are the days that I try to do things my own way, in my own time.

Lord, please forgive me for trying to do things my own way. Forgive me for not trusting you enough. Forgive me for taking my eyes off of you and choosing to focus on the wind and the waves and not Jesus himself. Forgive me for seeking the things first instead of the kingdom first. Help me want You above all. Help me seek you. Give me strength and endurance while I wait. Help me worship while I wait. Help me work while I wait. Help me worship while I work. 

Waiting. Working. Worshiping. This is what all believers must do. God has given us each a task; the time we will spend doing whatever that task is is only known by God. And we must be grateful. We must thank Him. We must trust Him.

Thank you Lord for keeping your eyes on me and helping me propel forward. Thank you for never giving up on me. For giving me the trails necessary to help me die to self, and to set me free from sin and myself.

Your timing is impeccable. Absolutely, divinely perfect. Like you. <3

xxx

V

saturday nights

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dang it

I should’ve gone salsa & bachata dancing. instead I stayed home and watched videos on YouTube and ate weird foods from the back of my pantry and fridge. I haven’t been grocery shopping in WEEKS .. can’t remember the last time TBH. Well, I bought a few thangs around the time of the hurricane 2.5ish weeks ago, but it was like PB filled pretzels and granola bars. All of which are gone.

nah I had like a can of beans ……. some old caramels………. dates and a bit of cheese

Yeah I definitely should have gone dancing. Lord. Tomorrow is Sunday and I’m going to pray at 10 with my friend Joyce. Then I’ll go to the 11oclock service. May hang with my cousin Hannah as well!

a friend wants to cheel in the later part of the afternoon, and I may have to work in the evening. And then onto a busy week.

Monday is work and bible study

Tuesday is work, meeting, lunch date, work and DANCING!

Wednesday is bible study ………. work……… ?? then night shift

Thursday is work………… mountain biking? ….. work

Friday is work……..

Saturday work……. dancing?

Sunday……

Time. I have lots of time this week. I MUST WORK ON MY BOOK(S)

Play lots of music. Make a video plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God is good. God, you have given me much time. Thank you.

Oh! I have to make a video for church. Also, whenever I “have time” it gets quickly filled up with stuff. I should be grateful that the Lord gives me opportunities to rest. Even when it is boring to me.

Plus, Monday, Tuesday, part of Wednesday I will be away from home. I will probably come home Wednesday afternoon for a few hours, and then go back out for work before night shift. Probably will chill at home on Thursday afternoon as well. Hmmm

Enough thinking about the future. Time for bed. very immediate future. 11:24pm

Brush teeth. Make bed.

Night everyone. Hope you didn’t fall asleep before the end of this post. 😛

xxxxxxxx

V

omgosh

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guys I’m soooo excited! I just registered for a women’s writing conference in November. It actually was supposed to take place a couple weeks ago, but with all the hurricane shennanigans it got postponed! Which I am THRILLED about. I didn’t register for it before because I was super busy with shtuff and also didn’t have the moneys because my client had just passed.

Well fast forward a couple weeks, and the conference is BACK in action and I have $$$$! PRAISE GOD I can go! I just registered and booked my AirBnB. It’s a super chic private room with free coffee, chocolate, and soap. I mean, how can ya beat that? It also has a keypad entry — more private, less bothering people occurs! I plan on checking out the dance scene while I’m down there, so I don’t wanna bother my host super late at night coming in. Soooo the keypad thing is nice! It also sounds like my host may not be there for some or all of my stay. Not that I really care cuz it sounds pretty private anyway, but that’s always a bonus!

Yes ma’am, conference, dancing… the thrill of traveling… God providing the funds and the way for me to go… I am PSYCHED!

As for today and tonight, I just got off work after 9 hours. Tomorrow I’m working a 12 hour shift. Then possibly going dancing… Prayer & church sunday. Then relaxing. 😀

Work all next week. Dancing Tuesday night!!!!!!!! Wooooooot lyfe is good. Life is definitely good. God has been SO good to me by re-teaching me what I’m good at and what I love. <3

Writing. Singing. Dancing. 🙂

There is so much to live for. I simply praise Him for helping me take the focus off of myself and put it on Him. He alone is worthy. And I am victorious with Him. No schemes of the enemy can change or break that.

Hope you all have a great night!

God bless xxx <3

V