It occurred to me

As I was turning the key to the top lock on the door to my garage

that I have a top lock

and a door to a garage.

The garage is part of a house, where I have a room. And a bathroom. And a living room. And an extra room for music and art stuff.

And I live near all of my endeavors, and near many of my people.

I have parking right outside.

I have a working car.

I have enough food, clothing, income.

And it was all given to me.

This life that I inhabit is so uniquely different than anything I would have ever expected.

Who said “expect the unexpected” anyway?! Well, they were right.

I picture things going a certain way and am always surprised to find out that they ain’t gonna go that way AT all. hahaha

*shrug*

And then out of seemingly nowhere my world is flipped in the best way possible.

Like me, moving to Virginia. And starting care-giving. And taking on more vigorous forms of it. And paying no rent to no rent to low rent to still low rent, to even lower rent for a better place.

It’s been absurd. All I can say is this:

God. Is. Good.

He cares for me. He says don’t worry about food, clothing, shelter. I GOTchu. 

He always has. And He always will.

I am taken care of.

And He leads me and guides me in the Truth. And it feels SO good. I am SO thankful.

Thankful.

Thankful.

Thank you.

Thank you.

A million times over, thank you <3

xxx

V

A Letter to the King

Lord, 

I love your proximity to me. I love how I can talk to you and how you listen. I love how you comfort me in your word. I love how you comfort me with your heavenly peace when I ask for it. Lord, I love how you gift us with imagination. I was imagining earlier today that I was in the mountains. I miss walking in the quiet trees and seeing the sunlight twinkle through the branches and hit different plants and flowers and leaves on the forest floor. I miss the smell of the earth with all of its’ mushrooms and twigs and beetles and birds and rocks. Lord I miss planting myself in your outdoor creation and reveling in the majesty of it. Will I go on a trip soon? I hope and pray so. 🙂 

Lord I thank you for all you’re doing in my life. The world would find that I’m strangely content in all areas of my life. I am at peace. I am overwhelmed by gratitude and love and a gentle sense of Your presence with me. I clutch onto this moment and hold it close to my heart. I ask you Lord, please keep me near to you. Help me draw nearer to you day by day and not be enticed by the world and its’ revelry. I thank thee for revealing to me where true life and freedom is. Thank you for freeing my mind to choose your ways… 

Lord, thank you for showing me where I have been actively rebelling against you. Where I choose to blatantly ignore the Holy Spirit as He kindly guides me and suggests the next steps to me. Steps that I have prayed for and asked for… but when I receive the instruction, I deny it outright. Foolish. I have been so foolish. I recognize this illumination as a gift. I just want to tell you, Lord, that I accept it. I want to be healthy. I want to prosper. I want to stand apart and lead others to your kingdom. I want to boast in your abilities and give you all of the glory for the work that you’ve done and the work that you’re doing in my life. 

These words are for you. Your word tells me that they are from you and by you and through you too. Your word tells me that you hold all things together. Thank you sovereign God…. for holding my little life together. I could write you a list a mile long of all the things that I’m thankful for in this moment, but instead I will praise you. 

Great Counselor. Almighty Savior. My Deliverer. Friend. The Christ. My Hope. My Peace. My King. My Father. Dad. The Truth. The Way. Life. Love. 

Oh, what love is like this? Your everlasting love that pursues and provides despite my rebellion. Despite my mistrust and mistakes, doubts and destruction. What love is this, that you wrote my name into your book of life. My name. You wrote my name. You knew me already. You knew what I would look like. You equipped me, before I was born. You aligned the stars and the seasons and the details of everything it took to bring me to the very chair that I’m sitting in today; knowing that I would write this very letter. You already knew that I would do this. You knew that my love for you would grow over time. That I would begin to piece together who you really are.

Yet that’s just it. My knowledge of you barely scrapes the surface. Not even barely. Hardly. The only thing I know how to do is surrender. Give you everything. Please Lord, please take everything. All I have. Take me, and every facet of my life and have your way!

“This is the covenant I will make with the people of Israel after that time,” declares the Lord.

“I will put my law in their minds
    and write it on their hearts.

I will be their God,
    and they will be my people.

 

No longer will they teach their neighbor,
    or say to one another, ‘Know the Lord,’

because they will all know me,
    from the least of them to the greatest,”
declares the Lord.

“For I will forgive their wickedness
    and will remember their sins no more.”

Jeremiah 31:33-34

 

You are Faithful, Sovereign King. You are putting your law in my mind and writing it on my heart day after day. I can’t help but turn to you. 

What love is this… that I should know the One who gives me sight and sound

What love is this… that He who sees my faults doesn’t cease to have me around 

What love is this… that reaches every corner of every frown and promises joy. 

I choose to rejoice, O Abba my KING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xoxoxo

<3

<3

<3

V

life is exciting

It’s not always exciting. Sometimes it’s tedious. Sometimes it’s painstaking. Sometimes it’s heart-wrenching. Sometimes it’s confusing. But right now, it’s exciting.

I’m excited! In about a half an hour I’m leaving to go to Washington DC to go dancing for New Year’s Eve.

I might post pictures of what I’m wearing later… but to give you an idea, it’s either going to involve sequins or glitter. Or both. 😀

I’m going with a couple friends from the area and we’re meeting other friends at the event! When we get there we’re all going to take a little siesta before getting glammed up and going out to dinner. Then we’ll pre-game in somebody’s hotel room before hitting the dance floors. There are TEN different ballrooms with live bands.

It’s gonna be lit. 🔥🔥🔥

The dancing goes until 6 or 7 in the morning. :-O I’m not sure how long I’ll make it… I can definitely see myself making it until 4 or 5 though. 😀 <3 🙂

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Yesterday I was driving all day long from the Northeast back to where I live. I drove for ~12 hours. Yep. It would’ve been shorter but we were driving in sleet and 34 degrees which caused 7 accidents on the interstate. The accident slow-downs added about an hour to the drive.

I’m just thankful that my brother and I weren’t one of the accidents!! Especially since he and I got into a minor crash on the way up North. He was driving my car and rear-ended somebody which caused them to rear-end the car in front of them.

Life is exciting, remember?!

Thankfully it was minimal damage and nobody got hurt. Minus some stiffness in my neck for ~3 days. Praise God!!!!

So back to the drive.

Right before the sleet I went to a specialty dance store and bought a pair of salsa shoes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

I’ve been looking at dis pair of shoes for quite some time. This one and a couple others. When I tried them on, they fit like a glove. Love at first sight. Glove? at first fitting? lol

Guyzzzzzzzzzzzzz you don’t understand, I’ve been wanting these shoes FOREVAH

And now dey are mine!!!! :heart_eyes: my own, my precioussss

hahaha

So. Yes. Life is exciting! It feels good to be writing again too! I left my laptop at home during my travels so I could focus on spending quality time with my people and quietness/reading/unplugging from technology 🙂

On that note, God bless you all friends! Happy freakin’ New Year…… whatever you do tonight, have a good time. Smile. Inhale deeply and look up. Appreciate the sky and stars. Or the clouds if you’re in a cloudy spot. Find joy and beauty in the little things and don’t forget to laugh.

Something I’m really going to work on in 2020 is living in the moment. Really taking in my surroundings. Observing. Delighting. Ceasing. Doing things that bring me joy and fulfillment.

I dare you to do the same!

On that note, gotta go to DC!!!!! Updates later 😉

XXX
<3

V

Counting my blessings

Sleep

Bed

Pillow

Water bottle

Coffee

Chocolate

Car

Money

Jobs

Phone

Hair

Friends

Hope

Bible

Bible study

Encouragement

Planning

Adventures

Calendar

Journal

Autumn harvest sauce yesssss

Parmesan cheese

laptop

fleece blanket

sweater

ugg boots

platform sneakers

dance

salsa

joy

peace

patience

kindness

trials

tests

growth

prayer

answers to prayer

camera

photos

testimonies

God

Jesus

Holy Spirit

love

hugs

dinners with friends

guitar

music

singing

writing

words

sentences

health

exercise

rest

blue sky

birds

sunlight

pomegranate seeds

books to read

notebooks

pens

paper

blank paper

markers

cousins

family

church

accountability

relationships

…..just to name a few.

xoxoxo

<3

V

Good morning :)

Hey everyone.

Just wanted to pop on here and say a few words of gratitude to posture my heart for the day!

I am so thankful for a good night of sleep last night! I love going to bed early enough that I don’t need an alarm to rudely shake me out of my much-needed deep sleep ynawmean.

I’m thankful for my lil orange mug from my college dining hall days– I may have stolen this 😬 but I was a different person then. Hahah I just remember when the dining hall staff had to make an announcement that people ought to stop stealing mugs OR ELSE since so many were disappearing. #FACEPALM. I’m totally not glorifying stealing now though. But I do love this mug!

Not to mention my “CARPE CAFFEINE” mug. Gosh. Is it silly to love someone small like that? I guess it’s a tiny representation of my love for my morning ritual. Make coffee into mug. Enjoy warm mug of coffee while doing bible study/devotionals etc. It’s the best way to wake up.

Water. I am SO thankful for water. Lately I’ve been realizing how much more water I need to be drinking. Part of my increased thirst (which I do believe I have!) might be due to changing seasons/having turned on the heating unit in the house?! Also, since I’m regularly exercising now my H2o intake has increased.

So as I was typing about water I realized that everything I’m grateful for this morning comes out of cups. This may be because I am staring at these three cups currently…. ish. (My water is in a water bottle, w/e)… or maybe… my cups overfloweth. Hahhaha

Or I suppose I would be overflowing WITH cups. haha 😉

Anyways, I’m going to go read my bible now! Got about 45 minutes before I leave for work. Today will be a long day… two clients back to back followed by a meeting and a dinner! The latter part of the day will be fun though 🙂

I hope all of you lovely people have a lovely day <3

TGIF

xxx

<3

V

grateful

To posture my heart correctly, I will now list off all of the things that I’m grateful for that come to mind in the next 30 seconds; and go!

laptop

blanket

bed

house, with perfect location

working car

good friends!

amazing food

church family

chocolate

autumn

leaves

airplanes

travel

freedom

excitement

routines

order

habits

coffee

bible

bible study

pumpkins

chai tea

green tea

grocery stores!

banks

employment

health

internet

wifi

leisure reading

time to rest

peace

joy

prayer

hope

encouragement

Jesus

music

guitars

singing!

identity

purpose

having a firm place to stand

knowing who I am

knowing God

God!

Holy Spirit

brothers and sisters

mothers and fathers, blood, by marriage and spiritual

banana bread!

upcycling old bananas into bread

marcona almonds.

almond milk

jokes

laughter

comic relief

transformation

fluffy penguins

love interests

dancing

salsa dancing

bachata dancing!

cousins

costume parties!

flexibility

GRACE

clocks

time keeping

scheduling

planning

provision

being taken care of, always

trust

faith

relaxing

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

okay. that was definitely a lil longer than 30 seconds. Not by much though. I didn’t have to think hard about the things on this list. LEATHER ARMCHAIR THAT I’M SITTING IN. Yes. I love this chair <3

Ice cream.

Freezers.

Meal prep.

Exercise

swimming

walking

biking

going out to eat.

worship

After this I’m gonna read a lil, then sing a little. I am very thankful to not have to do anything tonight. I was gone most of the day, and it’s nice to be home.

I’ve been sick-ish all week going back and forth between feeling better then worse etc. Not knowing how much to go out or stay in… I’m not super great at taking care of myself. But I’m learning.

Slowly, but surely.

I’m excited for this week… lots of good things coming up!

Bible study.

Bible study fellowship.

Fundraising dinner.

Birthday dinner.

Possibly a halloween thing.

Visiting friends <3

My birthday!

The next 3 weeks are jam-packed full of stuff. I definitely gotta be intentional about resting when I can. <3

Being boring.

Doing nothing.

But resting is definitely doing something. Definitely is.

OH BTW I met another scientist today who believes in God but doesn’t believe Jesus is the only way. I had an opportunity to pray with him right then and there but I didn’t bite. Next time. Definitely next time. I’m ready. And willing! Be bold for Jesus.

Lord, thank you for all the good things in my life. I know that all good things come from you and I THANK you. You are the giver and provider and sustainer of my life. I rely and depend on you… thank you for your Holy Spirit which directs me and gives me peace. I am forever grateful. Thank you directing me back to your truth when I stray away and get confused. You’re always working, always. <3

xxx

<3

V

singing His praises

I’m in love.

I kept thinking of times and locations I could wear this baby out and about today. It’s fleecy so I can’t wear it just anywhere or anytime because I’m in Virginia and it’s still in the 80s. Come on autumn!!! My girrrrrrrl.

I tried to wear it this morning at 6am when I was making coffee and doing dishes and moving about the laundry room and kitchen, but it was too hot.

It’s not just ahdorable, but it’s suuuuuuuuuuper soft. 🙂 <3 <3 <3

Surprisingly soft. And so dang cute!

Okay, that’s enough.

I was thinking about how eventually this sweatshirt infatuation is going to wear out. It’s not going to stay very enticing. Retail therapy keeps you coming back. But I don’t have a shopping problem, I don’t! LOL who am I convincing here.

But really, I don’t. I’ve had more expenditures than usual lately because I just moved and needed to get stuffs for my new place. Lamp, bins, fan, rope lighting (okay this was a “want” :P), wall decals (okay this too lol). And some other various items.

Time to chill now. No mo spending. Well, on unnecessary items anyway. I truly am blessed that I don’t have to think about $$. God has blessed me so so much and continues to as I entrust my funds to Him! It’s His money that He gave to me anyway… and He wants me to be a good steward of it. 🙂

Back to the concept of infatuation wearing off.

I’m glad God is not infatuated with me. He’s in love with me. He loves me SO much that He sent His son Jesus to die for me… so that I would be reconciled to Him. My sin was so great and I was so lost that Jesus actually laid down His life to show me what great love is. He gave Himself up for me so that I would have life.

God doesn’t tire of us. He doesn’t stop loving anyway because He doesn’t feel like loving us anymore. He doesn’t stop loving me when I continually mess up over and over again. He doesn’t stop loving me when I outright go against His word and His Holy Spirit and what He tells me to do.

Wow.

More chances. More opportunities to serve Him. Each day is just that.

Father, thank you for my night of rest anoche. Thank you for Your constant provision. Thank you Lord for giving me time to read Your word and study it. Thank you for giving me wisdom to understand it and apply it. You illuminate Your Truth to me and peel the scales from my eyes so it becomes clear. I thank you for this gift

“Wait for the gift my Father promised” Acts 1:4b

After you were resurrected, You taught and ate, spent time with and prayed with your disciples. After forty days you told your early church to wait for the gift that God promised to send. Then, you ascended into heaven; and the angels told the disciples that one day you would come back the same way that you left.

Then your disciples and their families gathered together, prayed, and waited for ten days. On Pentecost (the 50th day after your resurrection) your Holy Spirit came down upon your people like “tongues of fire”. Now every believer would be indwelt with the Holy Spirit; the third member of the trinity, and God in full.

.

..

..

.

Lord, why is it that I forget Your Truth?

How could I forget that You are with me and in me always?

How do I brush You aside and think that I could choose a better way than the ways in which You direct me?

I guess I’m thick. Hard-headed. Weaker than I ever thought. More selfish, too.

Forgive me for running ahead of You and hoping You won’t notice. 

Forgive me for choosing garbage over You.

Forgive me for placing anything but You on the pedestal of my life, as if anything could take the place of You. 

 

“Praise the Lord

Praise the Lord, you his servants; praise the name of the Lord.

Let the name of the Lord be praised, both now and forevermore.

From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be praised.

The Lord is exalted over all the nations, his glory above the heavens.

Who is like the Lord our God, the One who sits enthroned on high,

who stoops down to look on the heavens and the earth?

He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap; he seats them with princes, with the princes of his people.

He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children.

Praise the Lord.”

Psalm 113

 

His name is worthy to be praised!!!!!!!

Lord, please help me be a good steward of my time today. Give me focus and help me be intentional in all that I say and do and think

It’s all for you. Help me remember this Truth today; that it’s all for You.

xxx

<3

V

Ps. Thank you for my cheetah sweatshirt. I love it. <3

Where do I even start?

Hello wordpress world. I have missed you. I traveled up north to New England a week and a half ago to visit family and go to my sister’s high school graduation and I just got back this morning. I had a red-eye flight and had to be at the airport at 4:30AM.

It’s funny because I expect the airport to be quiet-ish at that time of day. But no, it’s super busy. And people were laughing and smiling and cracking jokes. And I was naht. I was on the same page as my Uber driver. He was quiet, and I too was quiet.

I sorta slept on the plane. The nodding-your-head every few minutes type of sleeping that is proof that I was actually asleep. Although I’m surprised that I didn’t get whiplash from all the times my head jerked up after I fell asleep. Thoughts of contemplating buying one of those neck pillows… Hmm someone just told me the other day they don’t work very well. Oh well!

So I’m back in my abode. And have eaten, slept, went on a nap and took care of a couple things for a couple people. Soon I will shower, clean my room and make my bed, and then possibly go over to one of my best friend’s houses for dinner with her and other good friends. Then I will go to work. Then I will sleep and go to work again tomorrow.

 

As I was on my walk I thought about the nice things that people have done for me. Two Sundays ago in church I was in desperate need of coffee. I hadn’t made any that morning because I was going to Sunday school for the first time in a while and knew they always have coffee. Well that Sunday they ran out. So then I went down to the Welcome Desk where I serve once a month. As I was talking to my co-server he told me there was a coffee cart behind the sanctuary and to go find it and grab some coffee. I went back there and the cart had already been taken away.

When I got back to the desk he told me there was a reception after church and there should be coffee there. I went to church and waited eagerly for coffee. On the Sundays that I serve at the Welcome Desk I leave the service a few minutes early and go back to the desk to answer any questions or give out information to people as they’re leaving church. When I got to the desk there was a 20oz coffee from 7-Eleven with my name on it. Apparently my co-server inquired about whether or not there would be coffee at the reception and when he found out there wouldn’t be, he went to the store and got me some. 😀 🙂 It was an awesome act of kindness. Girl’s gotta have dat caffeine nawmean?

<3

 

Then earlier today I was getting coffee with my cousin and we were talking about work because we’re both care-giving for one of the same ladies and she was going to cover me tonight since I just got back from my trip but after describing her crazy schedule I told her I would do it. And then she ended up saying she would give me the tube of organic mascara that I had ordered through her company for FREE because she wanted to do something nice for me. I was like yoo you don’t have to do that. And she said “I know, just like you didn’t have to offer to work tonight”. So that was awesome <3

You know, life is good. And our God takes care of His children. I’ve been in a bit of a funk with all the traveling I’ve been doing and having a bit of a rough time, but when I stop to count my blessings and reflect on all of the goodness in this broken world, I change my focus from what’s wrong to what’s right. I change my focus from one of focusing inward to one of focusing outward.

Also, when I got home from walking there was a bouquet of flowers waiting for me. Which I was expecting-ish? I knew I was getting something fresh because I knew I had to be at home for the delivery of this previously unknown item but I thought well, it’s either flowers or cake or something. And I knew it would come today or tomorrow. It was today.

 

It was roses. And irises. And a tiny little purple flower that I don’t know the name of. And I’m going to go take a shower now because I need to think.

Count your blessings. <3

xxx

V

grateful

Writing this list will help me develop a grateful attitude for the day!

last night’s sleep

my comfortable bed

best pillow ever

attached bathroom to my room

hot water

great water pressure

fluffy towels

coffee

coffee mug

water

fuzzy fleece blankets

sunshine <3

my job

energy

the Word of God

laptop

journalling

trust in the Lord

faith

quiet time

free time

freedom

friendships

working car

bank account

provision

prayer

accountability

hope for the future

clothing

shoes

dancing

fun

joy

pleasure

entertainment

music

laughter

sisters

brothers

love

peace

Holy Spirit

Jesus!

guitar

bass

singing

worship

“I am confident that the work the Lord has begun in me will be perfected until the day of Christ Jesus” Philippians 1:6

nature

outside

walking

biking

conversations

supporting

telephones

cell phone

adventures to come

<3

🙂

I’m going to go read my bible now. And drink my cawfee. And water. And then work 9-6. And then work 730-10. And if I’m crazy, I will go dancing after.

Lord, please lead me today. I am your hands and your feet; your light, your agent. I want to do your work and obey your will. Help me to trust you, lead on your understanding, and think before I speak. Help me not act or speak in haste, but only be quick to trust Your Word and the leading of Your Holy Spirit. Thank you for creating me, loving me, blessing me immensely, taking care of me, not leaving me to fend for myself, comforting me, providing for me, protecting me, enabling me, and growing and changing me day by day. <3

xxx

V

late night list

unsweetened vanilla almond milk with stevia

70% dark chocolate

my rainbow keyboard

favorite flannel shirt

fuzzy fleece blanket

prospect of sleep <3

coffee in the morning 🙂

pho tom

working car

$$$

jobs

house

music

singing

hope

freedom

peace

self-control

good relationship with food

travel

airplanes

rest

descansa

el Dios

hoy

bailando

salsa

bachata

forgiveness

love

kindness

reconciliation

boundaries

protection

Bible

Holy Spirit

Jesus

family

heaven

treasures

eternity

<3

Beatles

books

words

outreach

Good News

cell phone

communication

coffee dates

encouragement

ears

hugs

shoulders

legs

walking

skipping

running

laughing

breathing

thinking

reasoning

praying

discerning

trusting

modeling

teaching

leading

preparing

organizing

sharing

loving

blessing

blessings

blessed

bless

more

less

giving

enjoying

serving

employing

rejoicing

ensuing

pursuing

pursuit

goals

opporunities

flexibility

t.v. shows

late night snacks

late night gab

song lyrics

soul

my soul

souls

creation

Creator

create

date

can’t wait

fate

great

fantastic

awesome

awe inspiring

beautiful

beauty

joy

rejoicing

choice

I choose

to rejoice

in this day

and all You have made

and shared with me

what grace

amazing grace

has been given

to a broken vessel

like me

oh God

I praise

thy holy name

my Rock

my Redeemer

Counselor

Deliverer

Savior

Knower

of all things

You knew

me

and I

was

enough

because

your son

Jesus

made me

enough

 

so tired.

goodnight one

goodnight all!

<3