Bachata

So. I danced bachata on Sunday night. Or technically Monday morning. Starting at …. 2am? It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fun. The most fun I’ve had in a while! It helped that I had an attractive teacher. Who was also very fun and patient. And a great leader/dancer! 😀

It was the first time I’ve *actually* danced with a man. I mean there was one time in college that I took a ballroom dancing class…. but I didn’t like my partner very much. He was much too feminine and told me that I was swaying my hips too much. I was, by the way. I was swaying my hips obnoxiously. By accident at first, and then on purpose just to piss him off.

Haha HEY come on now I only did it on purpose for a second. And I was really only half-conscious that I was doing it purposely. I also took a mo to process whether or not I was actually swaying too much. Once I became fully aware that I was I tried to stop, and did. I wanted to do the dance correctly. I wanted to be a good partner. And it was fun! I’m not sure why I didn’t go back to that club…

…..And here we are five years later, and I can finally say I’ve danced bachata! And it was fun. Did I mention that it was fun?! haha I feel like a child! My heart is so full of joy! ^_^

And what’s REALLY cool is that last week I was prayer journalling and told God that I wanted to dance! Haha! And He gave me an opportunity to dance for real! I love when prayers are answered quickly 😛

Interruption: I just got some sad news in the middle of writing this. I won’t go into it, but I will just mention that we must remember the goodness in our lives. We MUST count our blessings. We MUST trust that God is good, no matter the circumstance. We MUST learn to be content in whatever situation. We must count suffering as pure joy, knowing that God is using it to grow us into the image of Christ.

And while there is still sorrow in my life, and disappointments, God shows me how much He cares about me and loves me in so many different ways every day. Especially when I’m down or feeling ill. He fills me up with joy and calls me back to His presence.

And that’s what this bachata dancing did. It was fluid, it was effortless, it was full of joy. He has always been faithful.

So I look for opportunities to dance with Him. A father-daughter dance.

Father, I loved dancing. I loved expressing myself. I loved following the lead of someone who knew how to dance. That’s what it’s like following Jesus. You call my name and say “follow me” and I follow, I listen. Lord call to me, speak to me, and pacify my heart during this hard time.

This is a draft from September 4, 2018. I am not as infatuated with bachata as I was when I wrote this, but I still do love it. I just like salsa more. 😀 Enjoy~!

Dancing

I’m so looking forward to dancing more.

Dance dance dance dance dance

My right knee has been hurting a leeeeeeeeeetle beet but I’m still gonna go dancing. My left ankle was also sUPEr tight this morning when I woke up so I elevated it for a while, massaged it, and then slathered it in olive oil and peppermint oil right before putting on my croc-like sandles. This last part was not such a great idea because my foot was sliding all around inside the sandal and almost coming off my foot. I should have put a dorky sock on to avoid sliding or maybe chosen a different pair of shoes. But it was 90 degrees today and “felt like 99” so I knew I wanted to wear sandals buuuut most of them are rubber. And my sandals that aren’t rubber aren’t shoes that I want to slather in oil hahah. The struggle

Anyway, ankle feels a lot better tonight. Right knee is a little funk but I think I will put some peppermint oil on it tonight after I finish typing this post and before turning out my bedroom light.

I have work tomorrow and want to be well. After work I am dancing and definitely want to be well for that too…

My heart leaps for dancing and fills me up.

I’ve also decided to stop drinking alcohol for the summer. Or even longer, I don’t know. Not that I drank very much before; 2 beers, 2 gin and tonics, 2 glasses of wine. Whatever. A margarita. I’ve thought about stopping drinking totally on and off and did stop drinking two summers ago for the summer and it blessed me incredibly. I felt the nudge again so I’ma commit. It won’t be hard to not drink, but I will miss the alcohol a tad bit when I’m hanging out with certain people or at certain places. But I’m excited y’all!

Tomorrow is the summer solstice. Very exciting! The weather looks pretty good too. Not too high humidity and not too hot. For Virginia anyway. Mid 80s. I’ve changed y’all. I’ve turned a new leaf with this heat thing. I still loathe humidity and avoid it at all costs but I can handle the heat a lot better than I used to. I still have to be careful and only stay out for ~an hourish to avoid passing out hahah but hey.

Other things coming up: a prayer and worship night. A ladies night. A concert….

A spontaneous trip to New England possibly?

Lots of reading <3

Videos to be posted <3

Time to be spent with awesome peeps <3

Dancing <3

2019 summer, here we come! 🙂

Lord, I’m grateful for the fullness that you’ve given me in your son, Jesus. He came to bring life, and life to the full, and I experience this as I walk by your Spirit and in your ways. Thank you for teaching me to value the invaluable: Truth and righteousness. Thank you for taking care of me and taking the time to communicate with me. Jehovah Nissi…. the Lord my banner; I love thee <3

xxx

V

dancing and kissing

first off, I want to praise God that I wasn’t robbed tonight. When I got to my car, the driver’s side door was not closed all the way. That makes me think that someone was trying to rob me, and thank God that they didn’t becauseee my laptop and guitar were in my car, as well as a decent bike rack, and some other stuff. My wallet, cash… yeahhh. When I got to my car and saw that the driver door wasn’t all the way shut I was like ummm. But the door was still locked. And everything inside was untouched! God is good!

Next time I’m going to make sure I park close-ish to the building just to be safe. And maybe hide my stuff a little better.

Honestly, my car looks ghetto anyway because I’m practically a gypsy. I slept at a client’s house last night, am at my cousin’s house tonight, and will be home tomorrow night. Thursday night I’ll sleep at my client’s again. Maybe Friday night as well? My plans for Saturday officially changed because I was supposed to go to some worship thingy for learning about the New Testament in the bible in depth, buuuuuuut apparently it wasn’t a workshop at all… it’s more like a college class, and I should’ve been doing work all month to prepare for it. But ALAS I did not know that until today soo my Saturday definitely just freed up! So I might do this salsa crash course. Thought it costs $38. I know that isn’t a lot of money buuuut that doesn’t include the gas for coming down here. Though there is also a zouk event this Saturday that I could go to as well sooo. We shall see.

ANYWHO back to dancing and kissing.

Last night was Tuesday night, which means — as of late– dancing! Latin dance social. Annnnnd I’m soooooo glad that I went! I have been feeling under the weather for days, but I think part of that reason is because I have eaten too many carbs and haven’t worked out. Hahah anywayyyy I’m so so glad I went dancing tonight. I definitely came out of my shell a lot more and had a TON of fun dancing salsa. I even asked a couple of the good salsa dancers to dance with me and they did! It was a blast.

The best advice I got all night was “smile and have a good time”. Hahaha sounds silly maybe, but I have been focusing waaaaaay too much about my footwork and looking “correct” that I haven’t been having fun. You can’t make that up. Going with the flow of the song is soo important. Once I did that and let myself loosen up enough to move my hips I had a blast and was dancing wayyy better! There’s still a ton of moves that I have to learn that can only happen over time, but I’m feeling much more confident in my salsa in general and want to try to dance with more dancers.

As for the kissing part; as a christian, boundaries need to be established in dancing. Not dancing super pressed-up against someone is one boundary. Another is, being mindful of other sensual moves and knowing how to steer clear of them. And yet another is, when you look deeply into someone’s eyes, it can invoke passion and a desire to kiss them.

So. In the last 10 days, I have had three guys try to kiss me. One was drunk and I want to disregard him more or less, but we did dance together, and it was right after.

The second guy was very cute and a good dancer.

The third, the same.

But guys, I don’t even know them! Kissing people you don’t know is dumb. It makes it recreational and meaningless. It takes away how special kissing can be when it’s with someone you love. It shouldn’t be done with just anyone at anytime. And the second two guys knew that probably before they tried kissing me. I said “I can’t” when they tried. One guy responded “what do you mean ‘you can’t‘?” and I said that I didn’t kiss guys I don’t know. I said I couldn’t to the other guy too, and he said “right, because we don’t know each other”. It’s like… people know. Let’s do each other a favor and have respect for others enough to not try to kiss them two hours after you met them. Or, in the case of the first guy, like 10 minutes. sorry not sorry

Dancing is very passionate. Can be very sensual/sexual. Doesn’t have to be, but can be. Can invoke a sense of closeness with your partner because of the movements. That’s why those boundaries are very important.

One of my girlfriends told me she thought about stopping dancing bachata in general. Because it tends to be more sensual. I don’t want to stop because there are soo many moves one can do that don’t have to be sensual. But the songs often slow down to a point where it seems natural to do more body rolls and isolated movements. Which CAN be done with space in between the dancers. And they can be done well. But if you don’t know who you’re dancing with, and don’t clarify that you don’t dance close up front, you may be disappointed when someone tries to get all close with you.

And it’s hard guys, because it’s nice to be close to people. It’s nice. That physical touch. And non-Christians don’t think about the proximity too much. Don’t question it, because they don’t see the clear line between right and wrong, and don’t have the help of the Holy Spirit saying “more space! It’s for your own good!”. When physical intimacy and closeness is shared between people that aren’t married, things get real confusing. You feel this bond and connection with the person, but only on a physical level. So next time you get lonely, you might think of that person and the proximity and how nice it felt.

But do not be deceived. Plus, setting boundaries is a great way to witness! And as much as I love physical touch, my Jesus is worth WAY more to me than temporary satisfaction. I live because of my God, and I live to please Him. And that means trusting that He’s got something better for me than settling for appeasing my emotions and experiencing “satisfaction” in the meantime. Which, by the way, isn’t real satisfaction because it leads only to confusing results anyway!

So, dancing and kissing. Watch out friends! Don’t be afraid to say no. Know why you’re saying no. Set boundaries. And enJOY! Dancing is wonderful and beautiful and amazing. Dancing itself is not the issue. But don’t let your partner take advantage of your body and skin for their own pleasure. And don’t use other people’s bodies for your own pleasure.

“Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that His Spirit dwells in your midst?” 1 Corinthians 3:16 

xxx <3

 

V

Tired

And still going to write this blog post. I’ve started about 4 in the last few days and never got around to finishing them or posting them so I’ma start from scratch right meow.

I should be napping right now, but I’m going to nap right after dis! Last night was Tuesday which means DANCING! Yes

Last night it occurred to me how special the place I go really is. It’s quite the hole-in-the-wall joint. It’s a latin dance social put on by a DJ/dance instructor that owns a local dance studio. He and several instructors come and dance every week as well as dozens of other extremely talented dancers. There are plenty of regular folk too (like me!) and it’s sooo much fun being able to dance such eclectic people.

Last night I danced with a french model multiple times. I danced with him more than anyone else. Hahaha guys, this dancing thing has brought so much joy and FUN into my life. And has given me some pretty great stories as well. Last night was a much better experience than when I went dancing on Saturday night at a new location. There were only like ten people there, and I ended up dancing with the security guard the whole night hahaha. 😀 Except for when I was getting harrassed by a drunk guy named Carlos who kept on trying to kiss me. Eww. After he LIED about being able to dance bachata. Ha! That dude couldn’t bachata for crap. It become quite obvious the mo we got onto the dance floor. I was like uhhmmm you don’t actually know how to dance do you. And he was like hehe uhhhh

 

Yeah buddy there was no hiding it! ANd then the whole “you are sooo beaUtiful! Your lips, your hair, your eyes. Woooooow. I want to KEESE you!”

NO

But he did buy me a mojito, so that was cool. The mojito ALMOST made up for his shennanigans. 😉 lol

I’ll keep you posted on dancing adventures, and the men I meet along the way. 🙂

Meanwhile, I love blogging. I love the bible studies I’m currently involved in. People keep saying “Praise God that you love children and He is using you to teach them.” Ummm

Yeah I guess I actually do love children…………………………………………………………………. it’s weird to think that, type it, believe it? Acknowledge it? I just haven’t had a lot of experience taking care of/being around kids besides my siblings (I’m one of five). And some nannying/babysitting here and there, but not a lot. Kids are tiresome, loud, needy, exhausting. But So Are Lots of Other Things. It definitely helps to uhhm make sure I’m getting enough SLEEP –soon, soon– and take care of myself well. Besides sleep, getting enough rest in da Lord is vurrrrr important too!

SO I’m going to go take a nap, and then I’m going to work on my book. The one that is on Christian Living/Fundamentals/how to grow spiritually. If I don’t schedule it in to work on/edit the book, it ain’t gonna happen. It hasn’t happened in months actually. Time to pick this baby up again.

And then I shall go to work. With the grocery store along the way for my client. And then I have a night shift tonight at my other job. Before I start that I’ll probably play some guitar. Life is good!

Enjoy your Wednesdays, everyone. And if you’re bored, watch my latest video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XkOMfzZfRk

 

GOD BLESS! <3 xxxx

V

before & after dancing

I’m starting to write a post now, at 7:14 because I wanna get hyped for bachata & salsa!!!!!! Not that I really need help, since this is THE highlight of my week…. besides maybe more dancing on Saturday night?!?! And maybe Thursday night?!?!?

 

But uhh yeahhhhh I bought two new dresses today… Not sure which one I should WEAR! Probably the blue one. I might even post a picture if I take a cute one hehe

So I’m about to get ready and then I’ma drive down to go dance. It’s 45 minutes away. Not bad. I’m used to living in the woods where everything is far away so 45 minutes really aint bad!

I almost wasn’t going to go dancing about 2 hours ago because I was feeling rather ill. But I think the main reason I was feeling illish was because I’ve been eating too many carbs lately and not doing enough exercising!!! So dancing is DEFINITELY what I need! Plus, I didn’t go on Saturday night specifically so I would be well enough to go tonight!

Ba-da-BOOM! Now I pray the Lord guides my steps and keeps me from bumbling too much. I’ve been rather butter-fingerish the last couple of days… hahahaha 😀

kk I’ll update later 😉


So here we are. It’s 12:18am… I’m to the place I’m staying a bit earlier tonight. Probably for da best since I gots to get up and go to bible study in the a.m.! Ahhhhh

it was so fun guys. Like, SO fun. I’m just feeling the love of God. He is so good to give me dancing! It’s such a beautiful gift to me. And I’m not going to abuse it like I’ve done with every other exercise. Once a week has been wonderful. Who knows, maybe I’ll go to the one this Thursday. Definitely the one on Saturday night if I’m up for it.

Ooh dang, my hip is definitely talking to me. And my lower back. Lots of spins and twists tonight. Hmm. One guy accidentally hit my hand on the wall. That was pretty funny. He said he would buy me a drink next week. And then he said the guy next to me would buy it. Then he said he’d buy me a soda. I dunno guys, I have a feeling he wasn’t telling the truth 😉

I danced with some patient gentlemen tonight. They were doing the salsa basic with me and said I was pretty good. I really gots to get on the taking-classes-wagon. Perhaps this Sunday? I found a private instructor who teaches on da weekends. We shall see. If I am not too sore/alive after possibly going dancing Saturday night (it goes from 10-2!) then I will see about taking a class Sunday afternoon. Though I should probably call the guy and see if he has any openings and if it’s by appointment only or a walk-in.

Yuppppp fun fun fun it was fun.

Back to the exercise thingy. Words cannot describe my gratitude and awe of my amazing God, the One True King. He had been nudging me to stop working out and trust Him for months and months. I would go a while and then start working out again. I couldn’t see that He would take care of me. So I stopped working out. Started trusting God. And within a few weeks, He gave me an opportunity to dance. After I prayed that He would give me an. opportunity. to. dance. I actually wrote a song called “Father Daughter Dance” which I’ll upload to YouTube eventually (youtube.com/skizarefun09). The song is about the dance of life, and dancing with God by following His lead. <3 <3 <3

But uhhhh yeah dancing is such a wonderful workout, but it’s way more than that. It’s life giving, heart-filling. Satisfy. Rich. Exhilarating. Expressive. Personal. Stylish.

I love dancing with so many different types of folks. I can’t even tell you how many dudes I danced with this evening. And each of them had such different styles! I’m learninggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3

🙂

K I should go to sleep now! I gots to get up at …. 7:30 I guess. It’s now 12:43 cuz I got side-tracked on facebook. #CLASSIC

Yeah I get up at 7:30, leave at 8:00. Go to WaWa to get coffee. Prepare the music time when I arrive at da church. I guess. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay life is good.

God is better.

<3 Buenas noches <3

V

low thrill threshold

my new client uses the phrase “low thrill threshold” when she gets excited about something seemingly mediocre. I lovee this. with two e’s

because it’s soo joyful! There are too many things to find joy in day to day that we choose to overlook because we focus on what’s wrong or worry about what we have yet to do. I am SO thankful that my new lady is joyful. Especially given her circumstances. She is disabled, doesn’t really leave the house, and her husband of 39 years just passed away in August… hmmm

Writing all that down and then reading it makes me feel pretty good about my life and my situation. When I start to feel down or depressed or hopeless it’s a good reminder to look on the bright side and acknowledge it could always be worse.

Back to the low thrill threshold. The littlest things excite me lately. My friend told me yesterday that I seemed “lighter”, and I want to attribute it to dancing. I am very passionate about it and it brings me SO MUCH JOY. It’s so fun. Like soOoOoOOoo funnnn!!! I’ve been missing it in my life for too long!

I danced ballet when I was like 6-10. Then I did some ballet in 8th grade… it was a summer camp. So I was like 13.

Theeeeen I did break dancing my senior year of high school…. and freshman and sophomore years of college. I loved that and got super strong, which was awesome.

So it’s been quite a while since I have danced. Besides dancing around the house when nobody is around! 😀 😉 <3 🙂

Plus, dancing with another person is a whole nother animal. Following the dude while he leads makes me look like a way better dancer than I feel like I am. I know it takes some #skillz to follow well, buhh likkke I know we be lookin like Dancing with the Stars a little bit and I don’t feel like I can take credit for that 😀

Anyway, dancing has brought sooo much joy to meeeeeeee and it’s seeping into all other parts of my life! Contagiously! Like a smile or a yawn! I guess more like a yawn, because a smile doesn’t always spur grumpy tired people to smile back.

Now I’m not trying to say that dancing qualifies for a low thrill threshold. It’s quite exhilarating, actually. But the overflow of joy that it continues to bring whenever I think about it in between days that I dance is crazy. All I can say is … Why does God give me such good gifts?!

??

?

.

..

..

.

?

??

I mean, ay I’m not complaining. Thanks and praises to my King all da way! He is good and deserves to be praised. That’s all I can say!

SO my fine feathered friends, look for the joy. I pray that God blesses each of you with something that brings you overflowing amounts of joy! He is good and worthy of our praise!!!!!

LOVE to all xxx <3

V

haircut and dancing

had to get a haircut, so I did. Usually i have a friend do it, but I really needed one so I stopped in Great Clips and got a shampoo and trim. It was maaaaaaaahvelous. I feel like a whole new woman now. Except the perpetual tiredness thing. But uhh I’m going to ignore that because I’m going dancing tonight 😀 <3

Yesss bachata and salsa, here we come! I have work til 7 and am then hittin’ da road. It’s in Virginia beach so I have an hour drive ahead of me. I should probably download some salsa songs onto my phone so I can practice the beat. It’s difficult! Dancing salsa is weird and foreign to me because it’s on the 8 count. But I will learn… eventually I will learn!

Actually, this weekend I may take a lesson. Saturday night? I got a groupon for some private salsa classes, and I know some of them are done on Saturday and Sunday afternoons and evenings. I am going to call ASAP. Maybe right now? Or tomorrow or Thursday. Haha the guy who owns the studio answers his own phone, which tells me it’s a small studio. In fact, the number I called seemed like it was a cell phone number? I hope it’s not a creepy situation! He asked me if I wanted private lessons for me and a partner or just me. I laughed and said “just me” and instantly regretted it. A couple days later I did tell a friend about the classes and he seemed interested so maybe I will try to recruit him to go with me… Then it would be less weird.  We shall see.

 

So

 

I wonder how many guys I will dance with tonight! It’s sooooooooo much fun to dance with so many different types of dancers! Last time I went to this Latin dance social two weeks ago, I danced with people of all ages and soo many different styles of dancing. I just gotta be careful not to get wrapped up in that sensual bachata stuff tonight. It’s hard because it is so easy to do, and some guys really enjoy doing it, so it’s a little awkward to throw the guard up and say no, though there are subtle ways to do that: like by putting my hand against the man’s shoulder instead of resting on his shoulder. And if he still doesn’t take the hint after that, then pushing up against the dude should finish sending the message!

Hopefully I just won’t have to deal with that tonight. Also, I think I will tell the dude up front that I don’t want to dance sensually; that I want to keep space between myself and him. Uggggggh I just remembered, I might see this one dude that hmu the next day a couple times who I completely ignored. #facepalm

Welp, gotta carry on! I’m super excited to go and hope my energy will be up and I will have fun! One of my girlfriends (at least one) will be there tonight as well, which is always comforting, and more fun!

I will give an update later tonight.

 

===================================================================

 

update:

just got to my cousin’s house from dancing. Ohmuhgaaah dancing is soooo much fun. I’ve been told I’m a natural at it and lots of people can’t believe that I just learned about bachata and how to do it three weeks ago. I know I’m a fast learner but staying consistent is where I have trouble. Being consistently great at something. Buuuuuuut for the first time I am now following the lead of the Holy Spirit in everything I do. I’m pretty excited to see how He will use me in my dancing!

Praise God for dancing and music. Expression of the body. Rhythm. It’s so wonderful! I could go on and on and on about how much fun it is! haha maybe I should become a dance instructor. Suppose I should continue learning how to dance first. Plus, following the lead of a male is probably way easier than taking the role of leader as the male has. I can follow well and look like I know what I’m doing but really I’m just following 😉 I mean, it takes some submission buuuut

PS. My salsa was wayyy better than last week! It surely helps when you’re dancing with someone who knows how to dance too 😉

I’m excited for next week. Hopefully I can keep on doing this Tuesday thing. Also, pretty soon I’ma reveal some crazy birthday planz that I have. I turn 26 on October 26 so there’s that.

Life is good and exciting, and God is even better and bigger and more exciting.

Have a blessed night y’all, and keep your eyes on Jesus <3 <3

xx

V

bachata ain’t grinding

Here we are again. In the wee hours. Well, actually I tend to think of 3am as the wee hours. 2 is just a late night. It’s weird cuz for the last few years I’ve been going to bed earlies. Lately I’ve been going to bed much later.

Lessons I’ve learned today and tonight: a repetition of what I continue to learn day after day: my worth comes from God. A job does not define my worth. My body does not define my worth. A relationship does not define my worth. And my drive and my prize should be my Lord, Jesus Christ. He is who I live for. Nothing and nobody else.

Especially not myself. So when I dance bachata, I won’t settle for sensual dancing. I won’t settle for getting too close with guys. I will raise the bar from the beginning of the dance and let them know that I dance with space between my partner and myself so as to respect each other. Let’s put it like this: if I were married, I wouldn’t want my husband to dance that way with another woman. So I shouldn’t dance that way with a man who isn’t my husband! It’s also confusing to get all touchy-feely with someone on the dance floor like that and not develop some sort of feeling for them. Or they might develop some feeling for you.

It’s not the best. It is not God’s best for me. AND it doesn’t glorify God. 1 Corinthians 10:31 says “Whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God”. I can’t honestly stand behind sensual bachata as bringing glory to God. I can’t. If it were with my husband, that form of sexual expression would be pleasing to Him as an act of love for my husband. But gettin’ all sexual up on the dance floor with non-husbands isn’t good for my christian testimony.

Mm. So that’s where I’m at. Many parts of bachata just is sensual. It’s a romantic dance. It’s very expressive and beautiful and free-flowing. But rubbing all up on each other is unnecessary, and definitely isn’t how bachata dancing has always been. That form has trickled in from selfish human hearts wanting to seek pleasure on the dance floor. It’s kindof like the judaizers in the bible times. They had to add all sorts of man-made rules to salvation. Sensual bachata is adding aspects to the dance that were never intended to be parts of the dance. Hmmm

That one may be a stretch, but the point is, bachata in itself is a wonderful dance, expression, way to spend time. The sensual aspect doesn’t feel right because it wasn’t intended to be bachata. Grinding is not bachata. Let’s keep it that way.

To all you new dancers out there, set your bar high! Be aware of the sensual aspect of bachata, and know that you don’t have to settle for it. There are some amazing moves that can be done in bachata, and the sensual stuff is so easy… Challenge yourself. Raise the bar to be classy, clean and make it clear to your partner that you came to dance not grind. You came to dance.

2:35am. Time for bed? I can’t keep up with freakin’ not sleeping. I’m not a vampire!

Thoughts are welcome!

xxx <3

V

bachata, salsa, and weak ankles

I am writing this post so as to have accountability with you folks on the internet. Even if I don’t have someone specifically reaching out to me and making sure I’m not doing too much too fast, at least I put this out there; even if it’s just for my own benefit. I’m writing this to make known that I, Velvet, am aware that I often do too much too fast. I rush into things and end up ruining them.

Prime example: dehydrating banana chips in the oven. My roommate was doing it and asked me to keep a watch. I didn’t understand the dehydration process at the time and didn’t bother to ask her questions about it: I just turned up the heat of the oven on my watch. The chips were burned and ruined. I felt awful! Haste makes waste.

With working out, and in this case, dancing, I am a beginner. I took ballet when I was a child but it’s been 15 years. So here we are in a new season, and I want to learn bachata. And I want to master it. But. These things take time. SO I’m putting it out there on the interwebs that I want to do this right. My right ankle is already talking to me from all the dancing I did on Tuesday evening, and then again at home on Wednesday. I didn’t do anything yesterday and I will try not to practice at home today either because I don’t want to give myself an injury early on.

I’m really good at being a machine and pushing through, and getting stuff done — no matter what it takes. I wonder what profession I should be in that wouldn’t be detrimental to myself, my health or others?

In this case, low and slow is the way to go!

It’s going to be hard though, since (1) it’s so much fun and (2) it’s a great workout. Great way to boost endorphins. But uhhhhhhhs

 

Anyway, that’s that. Just making it known that I want to take this journey slow so I don’t get burnt out.

Lord please protect me from myself! Protect me from my tendency to rush into things and go all-in or all-out and do too much. Lord show me how to be slow, and trust the process. And enJOY the process! Thank you for always taking care of me and for providing for me exactly what I need when I need it. Not when I THINK I need it. I don’t need to be a salsa-master over night 😉 Thank you for making me more consistent; like You. You are the same yesterday, today and forever… thank you for that! Thank you that you don’t get burnt out and just give up or end up failing. You are perfect in all of your ways. Guide me! Lead me!

<3

 

xxx

V

dancing

is good for the soul. I dreamt about it last night. I am still on cloud9 from dancing bachata and salsa the other night. Bachata can get a little sensual, which I could presume, but have to be careful of next time I go.

Salsa is a whole new world to me. I mean, bachata is too, but it is very easy to pick up. The beat to salsa is on an 8-count, not a 4, like most popular music. The beats that you emphasize with your feet are different depending on whether you’re dancing on salsa1 or salsa2.

I want to take some classes and learn the techniques! Here’s my problem:

I want to learn fast. But I don’t want to screw up my ankle. If I dance too hard too fast, I will definitely hoyt myself. I’m notorious for this, unfortunately. This is how I screwed up my elbow, I think. Overuse. A few summers ago I was a kayak instructor and was kayaking for like 6 hours a day. I hardly kayaked before that summer btw. So I went from doing little to no kayaking to kayaking for 6 hours a day 6 days a week. For 6 weeks straight…. You know what? I really don’t like all these 6’s! Seeing an evil trend here! Get behind me Satan!

Gah.

Towards the end of that summer I experienced some elbow pain that I’d never experienced before. There are a few other factors that could’ve played into the pain though. Like the fact that I started using a pulaski to cut thru large roots in the ground that we were trying to pull to make way for laying down steps. It was hefty trail work, and I probs shouldn’t have attempted it. It’s strange, when you’re young and fearless and seemingly unstoppable. And then you try something that never leaves you the same way.

Between the kayaking and pulaskiing. And probably the veganism. I was vegan for several months at that point and had already been dealing with bruising all over my legs from nutrient deficiency I assume. Not my proudest summer. But actually, that summer was freakin’ great and made me feel on top of the world. I soo loved being a counselor/trip leader. Tons of funs. And everyone loved me too! Which tends to help things. Except the 14 year old who wanted to have a “boyfriend” and hold hands and God knows what else. My co-leader and I shut that down (or tried to) much to her dismay and embarassment, and seeming hatred towards me after that.

Sigggggggh.

Back to dance. I’m not going to screw it up this time. I definitely want to work on some ankle-strengthening exercises…

And I won’t go dancing every night or anything. Though I am attempted because (1) it’s SO much fun and (2) it’s freakin’ contagious! (3) I want to master it.

I truly want to get good at salsa dancing. It’s thrilling. Dancing with men is thrilling. It seems like men who know how to dance will make good husbands. Okay, maybe that is an overstatement… But following a male leader in dance is very sexy and attractive. The man is supposed to lead. The lady is supposed to follow.

Plus, dancing releases mad endorphins since it’s like a workout. Except WAY more fun than a workout. Like, why force myself to do endless cardio when I can go dance………….

Dancing is such a healthy expression of life… I usually reserve dancing for when I’m home alone and can dance throughout the house when nobody is watching me. That is also when I sing loudly. Though lately I have been doing much more of both dancing and singing. Getting used to doing them in front of others is a journey in itself. But just doing the things is a journey for me. Soooo healthy.

Expressive

Exercise

Therapeutic

Romantic

Fun

Joy-filled

I’m looking forward to the next time I get to dance! Thanks God! For creating dance, music, rhythm… for giving me the opportunity to partake in these things!

 

God is good, all the time! <3

xx

V