Oh my goodness. What a relief it is to know you Lord.
You’re IT. You’re what gives me purpose. You’re the missing link. The missing piece.
You answer the “why” that I’m looking for.
Why am I here?
Why am I alive?
What’s the point?
How do I live in this jacked up world?
How do I survive?
How do I forgive people?
How do I take care of myself well?
How do I say “no” to doing and saying things that hurt me and others?
How?
You kept me awake all night the other night. I kept waking up, lurching forward out of a dream. A nightmare. I was in the passenger seat of a car and we were driving too fast. There wasn’t enough time to brake.
I kept waking up out of this dream and lurching forward to almost sitting straight up.
I know what You were trying to tell me. Hit the brakes. HARD. Turn around. Better yet,
get.
out.
of.
the.
car.
I’m in the wrong place, with the wrong person, heading in the wrong direction. And if I don’t hit the brakes, we’re both going to crash.
I knew that was You speaking to me through a dream. And people say You don’t speak through dreams. Ha
People say a lot of things
people say
people say
“people say”
it doesn’t matter what people say. It’s just words. But YOU, Your Word. When YOU speak…. we MUST pay attention.
Lord…
Thank you that you know my heart and you love me the same. Thank you for the gift of conviction and the gift of knowing You and hearing from You. Thank you for calling my name and speaking to me. Thank you for redirecting me. Thank you for capturing my attention. Thank you for not leaving me alone to make bad decisions that I’ll later regret. Thank you for wanting me to look more like Christ and less like me. Thank you for properly posturing my heart to desire You. To love You. To not just modify my behavior on the outside for PEOPLE but to earnestly seek to love you with every cell in my body.
Help me trust You with every detail. Help me not settle for the wrong car, for the wrong person, for the wrong trip, for the wrong direction. For the wrong motives. For the wrong outcomes. For selfishness. For personal gains. For thrill seeking. Lord I thank you that every thing you created is good… but it isn’t always the right time or place to enjoy Your creation. Thank you for allowing me to enjoy so much of my every day life. You didn’t have to do that. From the time I wake up in the morning to the time I go to bed; I love my life.
I love my life.
I love this life.
There are parts I want to change.
I am actively working on changing those parts.
There are parts that can’t change right now or maybe never.
I am actively working on accepting those parts. Even if that means giving them up again and again on the daily.
All we can do is the next right thing.
We must focus on the next right thing. We mustn’t focus on what’s lacking.
For the Lord is my shepherd, and I shall. not. want.
xxx
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