Do you ever look around yourself and think “I’ve been fishing in the wrong pond”? For too long I’ve been trying to, as Gretchen Wieners once said, “make fetch happen” when it comes to diet and lifestyle. But unfortunately, for Gretchen and myself, fetch just isn’t going to happen. A great man once said “love is like a fart;
if you have to force it, it’s probably crap.” Same concept as fetch. Sometimes we try so hard to dictate a situation and control every little thing as it’s happening. Sometimes we come up with a whole plan in our heads as to how an afternoon or interaction is going to go and it ends up being completely different than we thought. We set expectations with people we’re meeting, events we’re attending, places we’re moving to, classes we’re starting, phone calls we’re taking, etc. and by doing so, it’s pretty easy to get frustrated or let down when things don’t pan out the way we thought they would.
Instead of fishing for truth, faith and unconditional love, I’ve been fishing for good looks and a skinny body, and hoping I find self acceptance and meaning through achieving those things. I spent years under-eating and over-exercising trying to work my way to what I thought of as a “perfect” body.Turns out I’d been fishing in the wrong pond.
When I found RawTill4, I thought I had found the elixir of life. The fountain of youth. The answer to my unhappiness. A dream come true. I had struggled with not knowing how to eat for a long time, and was anorexic, bulimic, and an exercise addict for a massive chunk of my 22 year old life. It was a lifestyle that taught me that I could eat a lot more than I thought was okay, without worrying about weight or proper “food pyramid nutrition”.
I followed it mostly on for a couple of months and was glowing. I preached about it to everyone and laughed quietly to myself as I ate huge bowls of Nicecream and watched High Carb Vegan YouTube videos.
And then, being the Scorpio that I am, I tore it all down. I decided I wasn’t going to do it any more. I decided it was isolating me from other people, and was too much unnecessary sugar. I decided I wanted to learn will power again and eat every food available.
I quit and gained a bunch of weight. I started eating meat and eggs and pizza, eating ice cream. I got sick for 2 weeks. I had no energy. My skin developed blemishes. I was bloated and constipated. I felt like a lost seed that was blowing in the wind, not really knowing where it wanted to plant itself. But I suppose that’s a Scorpio thing. And it’s also a 20something thing. So it’s especially a 20something Scorpio thing.
Though just this once, I’m going to let myself eat fruit again. I’ve been fishing in the wrong pond. The fish pond. I don’t want fish. They don’t contain many carbohydrates. I want the fruit of the Spirit and the fruit of the trees.
Steve Jobs was a fruitarian. At least for a while. Nevermind about the whole Ashton Kutcher hospitalization thing. Only fools rush in.
Overall, as Albert Einstein once said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. Well, I’m in it to win it this time around. Plant foods lifestyle is the money. The jam. The fruit jam. I’ma play fetch the banana… and it’s going to happen.<3